


Symbiosis

by theredhoodie



Category: American Gods (TV), Pacific Rim (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Human, Drift Compatibility, F/M, Jealousy, Pining, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-05-02
Updated: 2019-05-02
Packaged: 2020-02-15 19:58:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 16,618
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18676414
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/theredhoodie/pseuds/theredhoodie
Summary: It's been five years since the Kaiju War and the newest round of Rangers set out to train on Kodiak Island. Among them is Laura McCabe, who is determined to become a pilot, no matter the cost. She'll get her wish, but it won't be easy.AKAThe American Gods crew have their hands in the PPDC and are trying to save the world, one kaiju death at a time.





	Symbiosis

**Author's Note:**

> Hello readers! Yet another big endeavor for me, but one that I love to do: a Pacific Rim AU! In this world, all the characters will be familiar from American Gods, transplanted into the world of Pacific Rim. 
> 
> I've tried to follow the storyline from the show a bit, character arc wise, but some things will be drastically different, such as everyone being HUMAN. There's no gods here.
> 
> Thanks a BUNCH to Diva, who not only beta'd this mess for me, but also gave me a good chunk of the ideas I'll be using throughout this whole fic.
> 
> Happy reading!
> 
> PS. Ignore my tags? I never know was people want so to search for so I put general themes.

_**SEPTEMBER 1, 2018** _

There were fifty or so people in the room, seated in rows of chairs like a goddamn high school assembly. All of them had passed Ranger tests and other PPDC tests to whatever division they were interested in: science, tech, and pilot were the umbrella terms.

Kodiak Island sat in the Gulf of Alaska, far from the continental United States. It housed the current Jaeger Academy, where hopefuls came to study to become part of the Pan Pacific Defense Corps. There were a number of people willing to put their lives on the lines against monsters that were thousands of tons big.

Who wouldn't want to pilot a giant robot to kick some ass?

Laura McCabe knew that not everyone here would last. It was inevitable that even after the recruitment testing, some would never be able to go through the process it took to Drift with another person and pilot a Jaeger.

She was determined not to be one of those people.

In front of all the chairs stood a movable podium and behind it was Marshal Wednesday, a pioneer of the Jaeger program and its first Ranger in his decommissioned Jaeger, Crimson Assassin. His co-pilot had been Sergeant Nancy, who was standing a few feet off to the side. Laura had done her homework.

"I'd say it warms my heart to see all of you here in front of me," the Marshal started, gripping the sides of the podium. One of his eyes was a fake, but no one in the audience could tell which. "But we don't have time to sugar coat this, recruits. You're to be part of our third wave. Passing pilots will be paired to fight in the Mark-III's that are currently under construction. I'm gonna burst your bubble and tell you that not all of you will make it as first wave pilots. But Rangers have short lifespans and we need the bodies."

Laura bit her bottom lip and glanced among the seats, Marshal Wednesday's voice echoing around the chamber. Her eyes settled on the only other person not looking at their newfound leader. He had dark skin and dark eyes and smiled at her before turning his attention forward. Laura dipped her head and hid a smile, clearing her throat as Wednesday got to the end of his speech.

"Everyone here knows what they're here for. You will become like family, the world coming together for one cause. So don't fuck it up," he added, breaking proper military speechmaking and causing a ripple of laughter to flow through the crowd. "Now, a word from Sergeant Nancy."

He stepped aside and a man in a bright blue suit and sloppy curls stepped up to the mic. "Y'all heard the man. Keep your shit together and bust your asses and you may end up in a Jaeger. For now, you've got your bunk assignments. Get yourself cleaned up. You're the most ratty looking recruits we've had. Get changed, review your schedules, and get your asses in gear for the longest twenty-four weeks of your life. Dismissed!"

There was a clatter as everyone stood and murmurs followed. Laura tucked her hair behind her ears and tried to slip out of her row of seats, to follow the guy with a blazing smile. She lost sight of him and, in her haste, nearly got an elbow to the face.

"Hey, fucking watch it!" she snapped, finding herself looking up, and up, at an infinitely tall man with bright orange hair. She blinked in surprise then narrowed her gaze into a glare.

"Watch yourself," he retorted in an accent she couldn't quite place.

She growled in the back of her throat and joined the swell of bodies in the corridor, cold and concrete. She had her duffle over one shoulder and tried to stand on her toes to find the guy from earlier.

Coming up empty, she got to her bunk, which housed a set of beds, two desks and little else. Someone was already there when she got there.

"Hey," she said to the darker skinned woman. Laura tossed her bag on the bed not currently occupied. "I'm Laura."

"Sam," the other woman said, glancing up from the paper in hand.

Laura grabbed her own schedule. "Damn," she said. It was blocked off in into hours, every moment accounted for and there were a few sheets of papers, mapping out all twenty-four weeks. "They aren't fucking around."

Sam cracked a grin and leaned back on her mattress. "No shit." She squinted at her sheet. "What the fuck is Jaeger Bushido?"

"Fighting techniques," Laura said, poking at her three pairs of blue pants and three grey t-shirts folding up on her bed.

"Why the fuck do I need to learn fighting techniques? I'm here for J-Tech," Sam grumbled.

Laura flopped down on her bed. "Dunno. Maybe they want everyone in shape when they're running around a Shatterdome fixing Jaegers."

Sam scoffed and glanced over at Laura. "I'm in fine fucking shape. I mean, look at me. I'm hot."

Laura couldn't help but smile. She liked this one; which was rare for her. She wasn't exactly a people person. "I can help you out. I did some prep work before coming here."

"Good. Thanks." Sam sat up, crossing her legs. Her bangs were cut at a bad, but intentional angle. "I heard the Kwoon instructor is a hard case."

"Nothing I can't handle," Laura said with a shrug. She'd soon find out just how wrong she was.

\----

The first day included a tour of the facilities. Followed by lunch, where Laura saw her mystery guy again but Sam required all of her attention.

"We need to have a bunk system," Laura said, waving a bread roll in hand.

"For what?"

Laura blinked. "I like to have sex. And I'll probably sleep with some guys while I'm here."

Sam made a face. "Just guys?"

"Unless you're offering," Laura said without thinking.

"Let's get to know each other first," Sam replied, not missing a beat. "Do you think it's a good idea to sleep with someone you may steal a Jaeger from?"

Laura was pleased that Sam assumed she'd get first pick when it came to the monster killing machines. "I'll knock before I come in. And you should too."

"Right. No socks on the door."

"No." Laura screwed up her face. "This isn't college."

Sam waved her fork around. "Whatever. Just don't pretend you're alone if you're not and then have sex two feet away from me."

"Agreed," Laura said. They shook on it.

After lunch, everyone went to Jaeger Bushido. There was a massive training room, the floor made up of blue mats.

In front of them all was an older man, balding, with nicotine stained fingertips. "My name is Czernobog," he said, tapping his fist to his chest. He was leaning on a hanbo. "Bushido is for pilots. Not to fight, but to learn. You will know these by heart when you leave. You could do them in sleep. And you will use in Jaeger for defense. If you make it that far."

Laura couldn't help but feel a tiny bit intimidated by this guy. She glanced around the mat. Everyone from the morning assembly was here, plus some. The Marshal was not, nor was Sergeant Nancy. Laura was one of the smallest people here but that'd never stopped her before.

In the back of the room-the room was ordered by height so everyone could see Czernobog up front-Shadow Moon gripped his hanbo in his large palms and eyed their Kwoon Fightmaster. Height wasn't a requirement for the Jaeger gig: they'd take any warm bodies in the hopes of finding compatible minds to pilot a giant robot.

Shadow was pretty sure that only half the people in the room were perspective pilots and the rest were various other crew and team workers. He heard one of them grumbling near him.

"I'm in J-Tech," the good sized dude with buzzed hair said to his companion or perhaps just to himself. "I don't need to fight."

Shadow shook his head. He may not look it, but he wasn't all brawn; he had a brain up there. And he'd read the whole Academy handbook. Inside, it specified the requirements of everyone in the PPDC working directly with Jaegers. Pilots, tech, crew, even the science teams that tweaked and performed security measures on the Pons system needed to take Bushido. It helped those  _making_  the machines to learn how the pilots would be moving, how the Jaeger would have to move in the field.

"There are fifty-two positions for Jaeger Bushido," Czernobog said, voice thin and rough. He was a smoker and, if Shadow read his headlines right, one of the first Jaeger Pilots. The fact that the man was still alive and standing was testament to his skill. Shadow kept his attention turned forward. "Follow me."

Czernobog demonstrated the motions, moving to a position and pausing. It was like learning karate as a kid. The instructor did one thing, the class followed, brief pause, and another movement. Only this time, there were hanbo sticks clacking against each other as people found they were too close and spread out a bit.

It was a mess, but Shadow kept up pretty well in the back of the room, along with four other guys a number of inches over six-foot. Shadow wasn't a small guy, but some of the others back here looked like mountains. The guy at the far end was tall as fuck and a carrot top to boot.

What a crop of souls the PPDC had gathered together to put their lives on the line.

Those in the room completely out of shape barely made it through the training exercise. Shadow was pretty sweaty and the room was getting pretty rank from all the bodies by the time Czernobog let them loose.

Some people sat on the mats, some headed toward the exits, dreaming of showers. A clatter of discarded hanbos filled the air.

"Hey." Someone touched his arm and Shadow looked down to find himself confronted with that girl from the orientation assembly. She was pretty damn short up close, her hair pulled back, face round and cheeks rosy from the training. "I saw you earlier."

"Yeah. I saw you too," he said, a smile forcing itself onto his face. "Hey. People call me Shadow."

She made a quizzical face. "Shadow? Okay. Well, I'm Laura." She held out a hand and he shook it. "I'll find you at dinner."

"What?" Laura was already walking away. She glanced over her shoulder and flashed him a smile. "Yeah, okay!" Shadow called after her. She may be small and just as sweaty as the rest of them, but she somehow pulled it off.

He looked for her, this Laura, after getting out of the showers and during his free hour in which he roamed around, testing out boundaries. There were rules here, like not taking trays out of mess hall and not tampering with equipment. Not that he tampered with equipment, but he felt around for how far down certain hallways he could go before he was waved away to  _his_  part of the Academy.

Shadow couldn't find her anywhere and was half wondering if he'd just hallucinated the whole fucking thing when he shoved food into his mouth that evening. He was starving and mostly just observed the loud voices around him, not interacting with anyone else. After all their time here, he'd probably know the names of all of the recruits in this room, but they were all strangers still.

"Hey." Another soft touch to his shoulder.

Shadow twisted around and once again couldn't stop the smile from appearing on his face. "Laura. Hey. You wanna sit?" He scooted over on the bench seat even though she didn't have a tray in hand.

She crossed one arm over her abdomen. "I'm too...caught up in actually being here to eat." She glanced around and spotted…someone. There were too many faces to see just where her gaze landed. "You wanna get out of here?"

Shadow looked her up and down and read the intention behind her warm brown eyes. "Yeah. Let's get outta here."

They slipped out with a number of other people leaving the mess hall and she took him to her room. She pulled him down to kiss her the instant the door clicked shut.

They fucked on the surprisingly sturdy twin sized bed. She wasn't what he expected, his face tingling from her slaps. But he liked it, and her, probably a little too much, a little too fast.

 

 

_**SEPTEMBER 8, 2018** _

The first week sort of flew by in a blur of rigid scheduling, Bushido, training videos and combat prep. Throw in the occasional handjob, blowjob and/or quickie during a lunch or dinner hour and Laura thought she had this all figured out. A little fun to siphon off the stress of learning how to fight in a  _war_.

At the end of week one, Laura headed to Bushido with sore hips and blistering hands. Non-pilot recruits only came to Bushido two or three times a week, according to Sam's schedule. They did some of the moves but Sam was saying how they'd be observing mostly as the Ranger hopefuls started getting better. She said a lot of stuff about machinery and movement that Laura tuned out after a while.

She knew almost all the recruits by name now. Shadow, obviously. The tall one with red hair who'd nearly given her a black eye? Apparently went by Sweeney and was from Ireland, way over in the ocean not currently under siege by giant alien monsters. An equally tall blond who was as dumb as a rock but really fucking hot was Donny. A surprisingly scrawny white guy with a whiny voice who wanted to be called Low-Key as if that made him  _cool_. A handful of women, though Laura got along with them like cats and water for some reason. Columbia, Dia, and a couple others.

Laura was prickly as much as she tried to push down that part of her personality. She couldn't help it. She had that self-entitled streak in her that she just couldn't shake.

Today, Czernobog had them pairing up. Except there was an odd number of Rangers and Laura was left with Shadow and Sweeney. She sighed and stepped back, leaning against her hanbo.

"Why don't I just let you two pretties duke it out, huh?" She refused to pick either of them.

Sweeney's eyes flickered toward her, a smirk on his face. "You think I'm pretty, do ya?"

Laura rolled her eyes and watched as they went through parry and block, parry and block, a little clumsy but not bad for just one week. She could tell just by looking at them that there was no way they could Drift.

As entertaining as it was, she snapped to attention the moment Czernobog spotted her doing nothing. He motioned for her to come up to the front, which she did begrudgingly. Everyone else continued their slow and clunky movements.

"You will have me for partner," he told her, taking a hanbo of his own.

Laura frowned. "If there's an odd number of Rangers, what good does that do? Don't we need pairs? Sir," she added, readying herself in the first form.

"Yes. There are graduated Rangers in Shatterdomes across ocean. And more Jaegers to be built for everyone." He smelled like stale cigarettes every time he moved.

Czernobog's movements were fast and fluid for a man whose body had definitely been through wear and tear, both in and out of a Jaeger. Laura couldn't keep up a conversation as she tried blocking his strikes.

After an eternity, the Fightmaster called for a switch, breaking up teams and putting Laura with a taller blonde woman. Columbia. She struck Laura as the perky cheerleader type, though even Laura could see a veil of darkness behind her pretty blue eyes. Even cheerleaders had layers.

 

 

_**SEPTEMBER 15, 2018** _

"No, no, no," Czernobog said, raising his voice and waving his hands. Everyone on the mats stopped. "You." He pointed to Shadow.

Shadow swallowed, wracking his brain, trying to remember if he'd fucked something up. The entire room was quiet except for the panting breaths of those working the hardest.

"You are doing well." The Kwoon Fightmaster looked around at everyone else. "All of you, watch this one. He moves well. He does each form but as himself."

Shadow couldn't help the pride that bubbled up in his chest. He knew this wasn't why he was here: he wanted to make a difference and protect the world. But he was only human, so a little recognition would go a long way. He glanced to the side and saw Laura giving him a small, warm smile.

"You all need to know these moves. But you will learn that Jaeger...you must have what...personal  _flair_ ," the man said, chuckling and then coughing. Czernobog slammed his hanbo against the hard flooring with a crack. "Go again, from the beginning."

Shadow felt a room full of eyes on him, even as people turned to their partners. Laura paused briefly to push his shoulder with the end of her staff, a teasing smile on her face, before they slipped back into the Bushido movements. She was small and quick, but he matched her well.

Czernobog's eyes were on him the whole time; he could feel them. And at two weeks in, it was both intimidating and exhilarating. Shadow didn't  _like_  fighting, even though he was built for it. He was a lot more introspective than one would assume, just looking at him.

And he didn't want to accidentally hurt Laura, which made him focus more strongly than he probably would, fighting anyone else in this room. Their staffs hit in resounding  _clacks_ , through to the more complicated positions near the end of the list of fifty-two. Laura's face was red with heat and screwed up in fierce determination by the end.

Shadow thought she looked pretty damn adorable.

"Good!" Czernobog said, waving at them to stop. They all did. "Face me and watch." He motioned Shadow over and they squared off. Everyone on the mats leaned on their staffs and wiped sweat off their faces as the two men worked through the whole thing once more. Anyone paying close attention would notice that each of them moved slightly off key from the traditional movements: that flair Czernobog mentioned.

"All looks the bloody same to me," Sweeney muttered, close enough for Laura to hear. She narrowed her eyes and glanced over her shoulder at him.

"Maybe if you stopped complaining and paid attention, you could figure it out," she said, letting her voice raise just enough for him to hear.

He made a face at her as the demonstration came to an end.

Shadow, thoroughly drenched with sweat, took a step back to the mats.

"In one month, some of you will be good as that," Czernobog said, smirking. "Natural talent, you have, Shadow Moon. Some of you," his cloudy eyes fell purposefully on the loud Irishman, "not as much."

Sweeney cursed under his breath.

"Once more!" the Fightmaster said, allowing Shadow to sit to the side so they'd all have a pairing. Laura found herself fighting Low-Key, who moved around jerkily and looked so sleazy that it made her feel like she was gonna catch something from him. But they made it through the rest of the positions with surprising speed.

Once dismissed, Shadow joined Laura and she gave him a smile and prodded his sore chest with a finger. "Look at you, teacher's pet."

He shrugged. "It's easy enough." And it was. It was like his body was made for this.

Behind them, Sweeney tossed his hanbo aside with enough force for it to clatter a whole nother bundle to the floor. He cursed loudly and left them, not bothering to pick them up.

"Arsekisser more like," Sweeney grumbled, shoving passed Shadow into the hall. Laura frowned after him, unimpressed.

Shadow slipped a sweaty arm around her shoulders. "He'll get over it," he said, kissing the top of her head.

Laura squeaked and shoved him away. "Ugh, gross. I'm so sweaty!"

"Like I fucking care," Shadow said with a grin.

She rolled her eyes and darted away from him to the women's showers.

 

 

_**SEPTEMBER 26, 2018** _

The videos and studying were the worst. Watching battles from the past, from both before Jaegers existed to the first fights between the giant mechs and the kaiju, was fun...until you had to take notes and figure out battle strategy.

He was too old to be back in fucking school again.

There weren't too many Ranger recruits, just eleven, and only a few weeks in, no one had been weeded out of the program. It was cold as fucking shit up here and Sweeney  _hated it_. Apparently it was the coldest fall on record in over a couple decades or some shit. And his stash of tobacco was running low and they only gave one weekend off during the whole training period.

He'd complain about it if it wasn't what he'd signed up for.

With a sketchily made cigarette in hand, he pulled on a jacket and made his way outside. He wasn't alone in his habit, but there was just one other person outside when he made his way to the unofficial smoking zone.

"Hey," he said, nodding his head and lighting his cig and praying for a warm spell.

"Hi," Laura McCabe replied, holding a too-long and too-thin cigarette in her fingers. She didn't look like she was shivering at all. "Why are you here?"

"Having a fuckin' smoke."

"No. I mean, you're from Ireland right? Why not just stay? The kaiju don't leave the Pacific." Don't was a strong word. Everyone  _hoped_  they wouldn't and the Jaegers were there to make sure they didn't.

"You ask anyone else that?" There were recruits from all across the globe at the Academy. Egypt, Germany, Ukraine, Brazil, Norway, Morocco. This Jaeger thing was a worldwide effort.

She blew out smoke and shrugged. "No."

This wasn't exactly how he'd pictured a first conversation going. Not that he did that. Often. But pickings were slim and the world was ending and they were stuck on this island for six months. He could, should, go after someone else and he probably would, but he didn't like that Shadow guy and the two of 'em hadn't been all that discrete in their extracurriculars.

Sweeney wanted to take what Shadow had.

"Why else?" he replied, shoving his hands into his pockets. "Fighting aliens in giant fucking robots. Ain't it everyone's dream?"

"Sure. Until you die doing it."

"You worried about dyin'?"

She shrugged again and flicked away ashes. "Not really. You?"

"Ahh…" He thought about it. Breathed in the rest of his cigarette and stomped on the ashy remains. "It'd be nice to die a hero."

"Nice?"

"Better than dyin' a coward."

"I never really thought about dying. I figured it'd just happen when it happened."

Sweeney nodded out toward the ocean. "It'll happen out there, if you're lucky."

"Agonizing death in the ocean? Fun." She moved away, back toward the Academy, before turning back. "You really need to work harder in Bushido. You can't just get into a Jaeger and punch a kaiju like you're in some bar fight."

"Didn't realize you were an expert."

"I'm not. But you're really sloppy and it'll just harm your co-pilot. Don't be  _that_  asshole."

"Fuck off," he said under his breath. His pride made him stay out in the cold until she had been inside for a full minute before he jogged back into the Academy.

 

 

_**SEPTEMBER 27, 2018** _

The next day, at Bushido, they were doing the movements again; all fifty-whatever of them. Czernobog kept having them switch partners. Sweeney was sure there was a method to it, but it was driving him crazy, having to get used to a new person every round of movements.

In a not-so-surprising turn, today his last partner was the tiny Laura. She rolled her shoulders and stretched out her back a bit on her way over to him.

"All right, big guy, show me what you've got," she goaded him, tapping his shoulder with the end of her hanbo.

The thing about these moves were that they weren't  _meant_  for combat. Not in the Kwoon. They were used to assess compatibility and get Rangers into the muscle memory of moving in the ways their Jaegers would move.

But that didn't mean they  _couldn't_  be combative.

"Oh," Sweeney said, tilting his head to one side. "You asked for it."

He thought her being so small would work to his advantage, so he could overpower her, but he found it alarmingly difficult. She  _was_  small, so  _he_  had to change his approach and while she had less body mass for him to get a point on, he often found himself left wide open for her staff to touch.

They weren't supposed to keep track of points, but she kept mouthing them out to him every time she landed one.

Fucking hell.

Neither one of them relented, sticking to movements that kept them on their feet. Neither of them noticed the rest of the class finishing up. Eventually, he saw an opening, cheated a bit, and Laura ended up on the mat, the end of his hanbo clunking down next to her head.

She scowled up at him. "What did I tell you! You've got to cheat to even beat me."

How she could still be bursting with fight after all that, with him towering over her, was both frustrating and invigorating. He scoffed and rolled his eyes, taking a small step back. "Fuck you," he said, swiping his wrist across his forehead.

"Hey, man, don't talk to her like that," Shadow Moon said, appearing out of nowhere and actually  _shoving_ Sweeney's shoulder.

On the ground, Laura sat up and then used her staff to help her get to her feet.

Sweeney squared up to Shadow, a good handful of inches taller. "There somethin' you wanna share with the class there,  _Shadow Moon_?" He spat out the name. What a weird fucking name.

"I can take care of myself," Laura piped up. She put herself between them and looked up at Sweeney. "Fuck off," she said with a smile.

Sweeney clenched his jaw and glared, but stepped away at a loud cough from Czernobog followed by a: "I'm not here to break up fights, you numbnuts."

Sweeney stalked away, tossing aside his staff and shoving his feet into boots, muttering under his breath the whole time.

 

 

_**OCTOBER 22, 2018** _

"You wanna go on a date with me?" Shadow asked, pulling on his pants after another round of sex. It was a damn good thing Sam spent so much of her time tinkering with the new Jaegers. She had yet to walk in on Laura and Shadow in the midst.

Laura, itching for a cigarette, scoffed. "A date? What're you gonna do, clear a bench for me in the mess and bring my tray over?"

He smirked and zipped and buttoned. "I'm serious."

Laura crossed her arms. "So am I. We can't leave the compound, right? So what's the point? Can't we just...keep doing what we're doing?"

Shadow sighed, swooping down to pluck his shirt off the concrete floor. "You have a point."

"I know I do." She grinned and pulled her legs up and leaned on them, arms loosely around her knees. "I'm having fun. Are you having fun?"

"I am." He moved closer and leaned down, pressing his lips to her forehead. "Got Bushido in half an hour. See you there?"

"Where else am I gonna be?" she said, watching him leave. Once he was gone, she stood, shivering at the cold floor underfoot. She yanked on some clothes and made her way to the bathroom. After cleaning herself up and braiding her hair, she slipped outside for a smoke before training.

As if the universe was playing tricks on her the only person standing out by the big barrel that designated the smoking area was Sweeney. Having nowhere else to go where she wouldn't get a demerit, she hunched her shoulders and walked over, shaking out a Lucky Strike cigarette from the soft pack on her way over.

"Got a light?" she asked, not because she was being polite, but because her matchbook was empty. She tossed the cardboard into the barrel.

Sweeney wordlessly opened and lit his lighter for her. She leaned forward and lit the end of her cigarette. He snapped it shut and shoved it back into a pocket.

"Have a good romp in the sheets?" he asked, his tone bitter.

Laura frowned and took in a drag. "Why do you care?"

"I don't. Shouldn't you have a bit more discretion? We're here to save the world. This isn't a dating excursion."

"Jesus. What crawled up your ass and died? And there's nothing in the rules against it. Donny and Columbia are  _married_  and you have no problem with them."

"They have a decency that you lack."

Laura barked out a laugh. "Wow. Slut shaming died when the kaiju arrived. I think maybe  _you_  need to get laid, release some of that," she waved at him up and down, "self-righteous tension." She did think, for the briefest of half-seconds, to off herself up for the job, before she mentally slapped some sense into herself. Flicking ashes away, she took another drag of her cigarette.

Sweeney muttered an incoherent curse and walked away. Laura finished off her smoke and shoved it into the barrel before making her way to the Kwoon.

Czernobog was in a pissy mood. He actually tossed someone out of the room twenty minutes in and it was not, surprisingly, Sweeney. With the group now down to an equal number, Laura was paired with Columbia again. The women worked well together, even if both of them knew Columbia would be piloting with Donny, as long as they made it through and there was an open Jaeger for them.

Hanbos snapped against each other, colliding inconsistently as each pairing worked together. They  _were_  getting better at this, as a whole. Some more than others, but it was coming along. Laura's muscles no longer ached from the unfamiliar forms, and each of the positions was getting easier to do. She thought about them less and just  _did them_.

"No, no, stop," Czernobog said, voice echoing off the walls. He cursed in some language, Russian or something, and flexed his hands. "Everyone off the mats. But you, and you."

He pointed to Shadow and Sweeney. Laura felt her stomach drop, but she stepped off the mat with the others. This was such a bad idea, and pretty much everyone in the room knew it, but no one said anything.

From where she stood, Sweeney's expression was dark and he had a mountain's worth of pent up aggression in his bones. Shadow was more at ease and Laura wondered if he was naive or just didn't pick up on it or if he didn't care.

She bit down on the inside of her cheek and clung to her hanbo as the two men went in for it. It was definitely more brawl than Bushido, lacking the control necessary for the steps. Sweeney went all in and Shadow had no choice but to retaliate.

Czernobog stood back and watched, his gaze simmering even as the combat got sloppy. Laura ended up gnawing on a thumbnail and eventually ripped off the whole tip. She spat it onto the ground just as there was a  _snap_  and one of the hanbos broke in two.

Which was not supposed to happen. They were flexible and strong, made for much more than just this.

After the snap, everyone was quiet, the heaving breathing of the contenders the only thing filling the room.

"You are both horrible," Czernobog said, waving his hands. "Disrespectful fucks. Leave."

Shadow gaped and Laura gave him a sympathetic look as he walked off. Sweeney was gone in seconds, like a storm.

The room chilled once they were gone. Czernobog's back was to them and he waved a hand. "Back in formation, the rest of you."

They did what he told them, finding their own preferred partners. No one changed partners for the rest of the session and Laura left with a few bruises from being whacked by Low-Key, her mind elsewhere.

On her way out, Laura overheard Dia talking to someone, mentioning how it was the anniversary of Czernobog's last mission, the one where he lost not only his Jaeger, Cherno Fury, but his co-pilot, his brother, as well. No wonder he was in such a foul mood.

After a shower, Laura scrambled to find Shadow. She eventually checked his room, where she found him rewatching news feeds from a Jaeger/Kaiju fight.

"Hey," she said, poking her head inside. "You okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine." He twisted around in his chair and he certainly did look fine.

"Okay." She hesitated in the doorway. "Do you think Iko will be brought back?" She had nothing else to say, so asking about the Ranger Czernobog kicked out was the safest topic right now.

"Dunno. Guess it's up to the Marshal to decide."

"Yep." She crossed her arms and glanced around. The room was just like hers, cold concrete and metal furniture. Shadow's roommate was Low-Key. She absentmindedly rubbed her tender rib where he'd smacked her with his hanbo earlier. "What're you watching?"

"Cherno Fury's second deployment." He motioned her over and she moved toward him. "You know Czernobog used to pilot with his brother."

"I overheard." She peered at the tablet in his hands as he pressed play. The feed was surprisingly clear. It was daylight, and close to the shore. It looked like Japan or Korea, one of those islands. The kaiju looked like a hammerhead shark with legs and arms. Its powerful tail was hanging on by burned flesh this far into the fight.

Shadow said nothing, but she ended up slipping onto his leg and perching there, watching the fight pan out, watcher cascading all over the place, blood and screams from the kaiju blasting out through the small tablet speaker.

"Look at how smooth the Jaeger's moving," Shadow said after a while. "That's a Mark-I, second ever built and they move it like it's nothing. Fucking amazing."

It still hadn't quite hit her that she'd be in a Jaeger eventually. That she'd have two thousand tons of metal connected to her through her feet and hands and  _brain_ , along with a partner. It was still surreal. "It's impressive," she said, her hands in fists, tucked under her arms. Shadow's arm was hugging her hips, his hand resting on her thigh.

"I think we'd make pretty good pilots," Shadow said. And by his tone, she knew that he meant them as a team. Which was a little too much for her to think about right then, so she distracted him with a kiss instead.

 

 

_**NOVEMBER 5, 2018** _

"C'mon," Sam rolled her eyes, looking over the remarkably small parts on her desk. Weren't Jaegers huge? Did they have pieces that small? "You've got Shadow wrapped around your finger, Laura. He follows you around like a puppy."

Laura scoffed, pushing some loose hair back as she bent over in a stretch. Bushido was great, as was the gym facility to build physical strength and endurance and stamina, but nothing beat a little yoga for flexibility. "It's just fun," she insisted. "We're just having fun. It's not serious."

"Mmmhmmmm. You tell him that yet? Have you told  _yourself_  yet?"

No. She didn't think she'd have to tell Shadow. As for herself...she was pretty sure it was just for the sex. Plopping down on the thin mat on the floor, Laura pulled her legs together and bit down on her bottom lip. "Shit," she hissed. Sam's musical chuckle reached her ears.

"I'd rather face a kaiju than talk about my feelings," Laura blanched, standing up and rolling up the mat to put in the corner.

"Bold claim," Sam said.

Laura's frown deepened as she got her stuff ready to study. She'd change out of her workout clothes and then review-again-the first two Jaeger vs Kaiju fights. Her eyes were going to start crossing if she had to read yet another complicated weapons analysis. Thank god for Sam and her expertise.

They were well into training, with the weekend of reprieve in the near future, just three weeks away. Maybe she'd talk to Shadow about things while they were there.

Just as she pulled off her sticky shirt, the alarms went off.

Kaiju.

\----

Everyone in the Academy assembled together. The Jaeger Academy no longer had active Jaegers, since there were multiple Shatterdomes in operation, including nearby Anchorage. They had more visuals and information here than on the national television news.

No one was joking around, and everyone was humbled and awestruck as the information came in. A category-two kaiju tagged Raythe was spotted heading toward the Russian coast. A single Jaeger was being deployed.

It was the longest, most stressful hours of night Laura had ever lived through, even surpassing watching previous attacks on the news. No one slept. Coffee ran rampant as the monster met metal and they watched video feeds from the Conn-Pod and also from high flying helicopters.

This was what they were here for, this was the reality of what they were doing. It should have scared Laura shitless, but it didn't. It just gave her even more reason and purpose to be here.

At her side, Shadow kept resisting the urge to put his arm around Laura and pull her close. They weren't your average citizens; soon, they'd be out there, fighting monsters in the sea. It was almost too much for him to handle, the sheer size of the creatures, the amount of damage that could be inflicted.

It took eight hours from sighting of Raythe, to the kaiju's grisly death. There was a certain numbed cheer when it went down in the water, avoiding civilian casualties. Marshal Wednesday pushed his way to the front of the crowd at the Academy and raised his voice.

"And that, ladies and gentlemen, is why we're here and what you'll be doing in the future. Now, I personally recommend you all rest. Everyone will be given until the end of the lunch hour before heading to your designated training." He said a couple more things, but everyone started moving out. Most went immediately to bed.

Laura stayed up for a while, staring at the dark ceiling, Sam's softly breathing just a few feet away. She laid there and wondered what it would feel like to have the power of a Jaeger in, under, around her. Would she still feel small and insignificant against a beast? Or would it be like being a god?

 

 

_**NOVEMBER 24, 2018** _

Laura had never been so fucking excited to put on a skirt in her life. It was hovering around freezing temperature but she honestly did not care  _at all_. Skirt, sleeveless top, boots with a goddamn heel so she could kiss Shadow without breaking her neck.

The well deserved weekend away from the compound had finally come, and even though they were only really going a couple miles away to the town of Kodiak that had a population not much larger than her hometown of Eagle Point, hovering just below seven thousand.

No one cared and every recruit was ecstatic about being anywhere else but the Academy for two full days.

They booked up the inn and hotel in town and spent the days bundled up and wandering around, buying food and filling the bars. At least, now that it was later in the day, the bars would be filling up.

Laura had forced Sam to get a room with her, not wanting to go as far as to sharing a room with Shadow just yet. It was agreed upon under the assumption that Laura would just end up in Shadow's room anyway. Sam's idea of dressing up was in overalls and a thick green sweater.

"I'm just here to drink, not to fuck," Sam said once Laura commented. "You're looking like a nice piece of ass though."

Laura leaned toward the mirror to fix her lipstick. It was old and she should probably buy a new one but she couldn't be bothered, what with enormous alien monsters attacking the Pacific coastlines. "Thank you," she said, taking a step back. "Think this is as good as it's gonna get."

"Shadow will literally do anything to get in your pants with you looking like that. Especially considering you usually look like shit at the Academy." Sam laughed and ducked from the pillow Laura threw at her. "Look, I'm just saying...you have any kinks? Tonight would be the night to lay em out. He'll do them. Guaranteed."

"You're ridiculous," Laura snorted, grabbing her thick winter jacket and pulled it on, leaving it open for now. Her legs would freeze, but if Sam was right, it would be worth it.

"Have fun!" Sam yelled as she stepped out into the hallway. "If you're still there when I come by later, I'll say hi." She flipped on the TV and lounged back on one of the beds.

Laura shook her head and yanked the door closed behind her. She walked down the carpeted hall, thankful for the heat blasting through it. She rounded the corner at the end, where the stairs and elevator were and spotted the last person she wanted to see.

Couldn't she just have one damn day with no Sweeney fucking things up?

He, unfortunately, turned at the sound of her approach. He was wearing pants that looked dark green and a weird, cowboyish looking button down. His hair was also trimmed up, the sides shorn down to nearly his scalp, the rest a mess of red curls.

He looked  _good_  and she hated herself for thinking it.

"Hey," he said, his standard greeting. He licked his lips out of reflex and raked his eyes over her. She was, for once, wearing something that wasn't completely shapeless. "Headin' out?"

Laura shoved her hands into her jacket pockets and closed it over her outfit. She tossed back curled hair and met his eyes. "Obviously. I'm not gonna spend my first free night in three months in a dank hotel room." The hotel was actually pretty nice, but she was feeling cloudy like a rumbling thunderstorm in his presence.

"Yeah. You look nice," he said hastily, before plucking a pre-rolled cigarette from behind his ear and popping it between his lips.

Laura blinked slowly and then scoffed. She turned her attention to the elevator doors.

"What did I ever do to you?" he asked, tone suddenly fiery and accusatory.

She sighed. This was not what she wanted to be doing tonight. Shadow was waiting. "Nothing. You're just generally irritating."

Sweeney took the cig from his lips and put it behind his ear again. "Oh...this'll be grand." Without saying much of anything, he was already making her want to fight.

She fisted her hands inside her pockets. And then she just dug in. "You're loud and arrogant and do nothing but complain. You think you deserve to be here but you have nothing to show for it. And...you're just too fucking tall!" she added.

Sweeney snorted out a laugh, dry and humorless. "And that bothers you?"

"Yes!" She stamped her foot in her tall heels. Her damned feet were already hurting, having forgotten what it was like to walk in anything other than combat boots. "I am  _all_  for arguments but you do nothing but shit on anything and everything."

"Oh, pot, kettle, black. You're not such a fucking joy to be around either."

Laura glared and turned her attention back to the elevator. "Shouldn't you be, oh I don't know, fucking off or something?"

Sweeney let out a huff and turned, clomping down the stairs. It was then that Laura realized he'd never hit the call button for the elevator. "Fuck," she muttered, lurching forward to push it repeatedly.

By the time she got downstairs and found Shadow in the parking lot, she was still fuming and in need of a distraction. Luckily, he was really taking this  _date_  thing seriously. She kept insisting it wasn't a date and he just laughed and let her say that.

But he'd gotten them a seat at a place and ordered expensive, fresh seafood that was free from kaiju blue and radiation and she downed a good amount of wine. Not enough to get drunk, but enough to feel light and warm.

"So, we should talk," Laura said, once they'd gotten through most of their meal. "I mean...about things. You know?"

Shadow looked at her quizzically. "Yeah. Talking's good. What do you want to talk about?"

"Us...and the fact that there isn't an us," she said slowly, avoiding his eyes and leaning against the back of her chair.

"Says the woman currently on a date."

The corner of her lips quirked up and she met his dark eyes across the table. "You really think this is a date?" She tried to take herself out of the moment, to observe and see what she thought was happening here. Did she like Shadow? Sure. He was handsome and good in bed and he was kind of good and naive, which was different from her past run of boyfriends and fuck buddies.

Everything was a lot more complicated when you added the kaiju and Ranger program to things.

"I'd like to think so." He purposefully laid his arm across the table, hand open to her. "Life is shorter than it used to be. And I like you, Laura. So why not go for it?"

She wasn't  _scared_  but she definitely wasn't sure she could handle the emotional hoops a relationship cost while also prepping herself for Drifting with another pilot. And what if she ended up Drifting with Shadow? Would that change things? Would it make it worse? Or better?

"Okay, back track," Shadow said, though he left his hand there. "What's going on? You've obviously got a lot going on up there."

"I just...I'm thinking. There's a lot to think about."

"No, there's not." He sat forward. "There's just us. Forget about the rest."

Laura arched her eyebrows. "Forget about the war between us and the kaiju? Not so easy."

"Just for right now. Trust me." He was so damn genuine that she couldn't help but humor him. She even put her hand in his. He wrapped his fingers around hers.

"Okay. So just us. If nothing else was going on, what do you say?"

In a moment of pure, raw truth, she thought about how she didn't want to be alone. And he was right, their lives were short. "I guess I'd say that...this  _is_  a date," is what she gave him.

He broke out into a smile that outshined the lights in the restaurant. "God, you're so stubborn. I love you," he breathed out, completely at ease.

 _Oh_ , her brain went. She smiled hesitantly. "I...I love you too," she said automatically because what else was she supposed to say?

They did one of those movie kisses where they kissed over the table and Laura managed to not get food on her shirt, nor set her hair on fire in the candle flickering there.

\----

Sweeney drank deeply from his Southern Comfort and coke. It tasted like shit and must have been a rip off brand but he drank it anyway. The bar was filled with celebration. The locals must have been used to this: the Rangers coming for their weekend break. Like spring break, but a lot shorter and a lot more bittersweet.

They were three months closer to putting their lives on the line. Three months closer to death by kaiju.

He wished he wasn't waiting here for Laura, but he was and he'd be fooling himself by thinking anything else. He kept thinking about those fleeting fucking moments on the mats in the Kwoon when Czernobog paired them together and they seemed to  _click_. Those beats were constantly at battle the same way every conversation of theirs seemed to go. Straight to insults like two bulls butting heads and talking around each other. It was fucking exhausting.

Hence the drinking, hunched over the bar as live music blasted and tables were pushed aside to make room for dancing. Out of the corner of his eye, Donny and Columbia made a pretty sight, all blonde hair and smiles.

 _Fuck them_ , Sweeney thought, drinking down to the bottom of the glass. Tried drowning out the flash of memory of Laura all prettied up. She looked quite nice in her grey shirts and blue pants at the Academy. But she was something else in that damned short skirt with her hair all nice and her legs showing.

Her legs showing! Like he was a fucking Victorian getting a hard on from seeing some chick's bare ankle.

He slammed his cup down on the worn wood bartop and it was refilled a second time. There was a gust of cold air from outside as someone came in to the toasty warm fishing town bar. There were mounted fish on the walls and nets serving as decoration on the ceiling.

Sweeney twisted in his seat to see the new arrivals and got the  _unfortunate_  vision of Laura removing her huge winter coat. Her tiny frame was in black and gold and fuck it all if she didn't look glowing like the sun and happy as fuck.

Bitterness swept through him as he watched from his place in the corner, at the end of the bar, as Laura dragged Shadow onto the cleared floor space. He was a pitiful fucking fool watching her laugh and enjoy herself in the arms of another man.

"Fuck," he grumbled out, finishing off his glass. Most of the people in this place were from the Academy. Surprisingly, some of the J-tech women cleaned up nice once they were out of their coveralls, squished hats and layer of grease.

Maybe he could find one to distract himself with. He damned well needed it.

\----

Sam eventually tore herself away from mindless tv shows-it sure beat watching the news at all times and even in war, people needed to distract themselves and give themselves a break from the craziness going on-and headed out to the bar. She bundled up and brushed hastily chopped bangs from her forehead as she walked down the street to the one place with the most commotion.

There was a carving of a mermaid on what looked like an old mast hanging out by the door to the place, marking it a definite fishing village area. The music was loud and she was hit with a wave of heat and sound when she pulled the door open.

The place was booming, stuffed to capacity by PPDC people. Sam recognized a number of her fellow J-tech recruits, a few of her superiors, and all eleven of the Ranger hopefuls. Donny and Columbia were gathering drinks at the bar. Dia was dancing by herself close to the band and having a grand old time. Low-Key was sitting off to the side, though there was a local girl at his side. And, of course, Laura and Shadow were doing that whole sex-on-the-dance-floor close dancing that made Sam roll her eyes.

She first made her way to the bar. Just as she got there, someone got up from the darkened corner. She recognized him for a moment as another Ranger, tall with red hair and instantly realized it was Sweeney. Who Laura spent a great deal of time complaining about. There was apparently a stupid macho rivalry between him and Shadow.

Sam didn't give him a second thought and ordered herself a light beer before weaving through the crowd and patting Laura's shoulder to get her attention. They had to yell over the music, but they didn't say much and Sam eventually stepped away to a seat at a high table by the window.

Laura looked remarkably happy and she was still  _with_  Shadow, so apparently their talk had gone well. Laura was great, in the way a cactus was great to hug, but she had some serious issues. Like Shadow seemed like a great dude and she was just gonna throw it away for…what?

In any case, it warmed Sam's little soul to see the two of them being sickly sweet. Her eyes dragged themselves back to the bar, at the empty space where Sweeney had been sitting. She frowned a little bit, wondering if he'd left so abruptly because of it.

Then she realized she didn't care, shrugged and sat back and enjoyed the music and the warmth.

 

 

_**DECEMBER 1, 2018** _

Laura's muscles were used to the rigors of training, and she'd be pleased to tell anyone who'd listen-mostly Sam and also the doctors who did routine checkups on all the Rangers-that she'd added a couple of pounds of pure muscle to her slight and petite frame. She reached three digits on a scale now, which was pretty impressive if you asked her.

However, that didn't mean she could take down any of the impressively large Rangers with the more complicated point positions on the mats. Shadow  _let her_  a few times, since he often used his friendly relationship with Czernobog to let the two of them spar.

It was fun, since she trusted him, but  _she_  didn't hold back. And today, her whole body was abuzz from the weekend. Just two short days and two long nights and that was enough to help siphon off some stress. And had led to her somehow being in a relationship. Which wasn't a  _first_  but it had been a while since her high school boyfriend.

Laura didn't hate it, but she also knew that she was here for Jaeger Ranger training and she wasn't going to go easy on anyone here. They were still all fighting for a place in a Jaeger, and she wasn't going to let a little thing like a relationship stop her from getting what she wanted.

Hanbos clacked together and bruises blossomed on ribs and arms and shoulders as the lesson tore through the first set of positions.

"Switch," Czernobog said, tapping his thin lips with a finger and looking at the ten Rangers-Iko hadn't returned-with scrutiny. He then paired them off: Donny and Columbia, Jack and Dia, Zorya and Petra, Shadow and Low-Key, Laura and Sweeney.

Shadow was used to this, but Laura could tell that it bothered him. Maybe more so after the weekend. Laura tried not to think about it.

"You look like shit," she commented to Sweeney. Because he did.

He grunted a response and came right at her. She blocked and they, and everyone else, moved through the lesson.

There were a few tiny moments in which Laura had to admit even to herself, that when she was paired with Sweeney felt...in sync. They were brief as hell; so brief that she couldn't actually remember what it felt like until it happened again. She wracked her brain, trying to remember if it ever happened with Shadow, but she let herself get distracted for a mere moment and felt Sweeney land a single blow, though it was soft and probably wouldn't bruise.

She huffed and flicked hair out of her face as he stepped back and spun the staff before they were at it again.

Czernobog didn't move any of them around after that.

A whole week passed and they stuck with the same partners. It didn't take a genius to figure out that he was trying to be sure they'd be compatible. That was the purpose of the Kwoon fight training, at least at this stage in the game.

"I don't like it," Shadow said over lunch one day. A lunch that they were actively taking in the mess and not shoving food in their mouths as quickly as possible to then run off to find a bed.

Laura sighed, rubbing her temples, feeling a headache forming. "You don't like  _it_  or you don't like Sweeney?"

Shadow made a face. "Both? Who could like Sweeney? Do you?"

"No. He's pretty miserable." Laura pressed her palms to her eyes and then gave up. "We don't really have a choice. Czernobog's the Fightmaster so he holds all the cards," she grumbled, stabbing at thin and watery mashed potatoes.

"But I think we'd be fine," Shadow insisted. "You and me. Don't you feel it?"

"Sure." Laura, in fact, did not feel it and was actually pretty fucking worried about Drifting with Shadow. Was she really ready to lay out all her thoughts and feelings to someone she was sleeping with? That was a kind of vulnerable she wasn't sure she'd ever be ready for. "But it's only been one week, Puppy. We've got almost three months left. Just let it play out."

Shadow grumbled about it some more until she rubbed his back with her tiny hand and laid her head against his shoulder and tried to make him laugh. She succeeded finally and the disaster was averted for a little while longer.

 

 

**DECEMBER 16, 2018**

Shadow still hates Sweeney being paired with Laura, two weeks in. Czernobog occasionally split them up, on those days where the newly recruited J-tech and K-science came for their two-times-weekly lessons. Those days, Shadow could breath and feel at ease, otherwise he felt like he was always waiting for a stab to the back from the tall Irishman.

And he fucking hated it. He'd dealt with enough looking over his shoulder as a kid, new to America, black and too kind for his own good. Just because he looked the part didn't mean he appreciated a brawl. He didn't.

Laura mostly paired herself up with her roommate, Sam, on those days. Laura would always win, taking it seriously as she did everything, but she'd still look happier than the days she was paired with Sweeney.

By the end of those days, Shadow could  _feel_  the fury rolling of her like waves. It seemed like Shadow wasn't the only one who got worked up over Sweeney.

Shadow was trying to do better about focusing on his own matches with Low-Key. At the beginning of this week, Czernobog had started telling them to blend and move more organically, while keeping the proper positions in their muscle memory.

He was starting to train them to move  _together_  as units. Bushido was never about combat, it was about finding a compatible match. After the physical stuff, the only thing left was for the neural tech.

Shadow was pretty excited about that. He was far past the horror stories of the first Rangers' hiccups and wanted to work in a Jaeger. Hopefully, with Laura at his side. Because he honestly could not believe that she and Sweeney would end up being compatible.

The two Rangers in question were going all in, a few feet away on the mats. Laura couldn't really say that Sweeney was sloppy on the mats anymore. Maybe she'd misread him from the get-go. But it didn't matter because he was keeping her on her toes and turning this into a competition. She didn't mind and actually found it kind of thrilling.

Whenever she and Shadow managed to get in a bit of sparring, either during their classes or on their off time, there was a certain controlled aspect to it, but there was a respect that was almost  _too_  respectful.

Sweeney had none of that.

He wouldn't outright get into a fisticuffs fight with her but he certainly didn't hold back. Laura found herself constantly finding herself having to work  _with_  what he was doing instead of working against it.

She felt those flashing moments of being  _in sync_  as their hanbos clashed and the rest of the room sort of fell away. It wasn't quite like a dance, but there was some symbiosis. Laura even fell into more aggressive blocks and shots than she usually would utilize, finally reaching the breaking point of being nice and tidy with her fighting.

In a blur, somehow, he ended up on his knees, her staff stopping just over his Adam's apple. Both of them were sweaty and panting and Laura's whole body felt electric.

"See," Sweeney said with a smirk, his eyes boring into her own. "How about that? You like that."

The statement, the intensity of his eyes...it all hit her square in the core and she took a tiny step back, dropping her hanbo to her side. She let out a few even, quick breaths and tried to shake away the sexual undertones but had little to no chance before Shadow, ramped up by his own lesson, took up his frustrations with Sweeney.

In a flash, they were honest to god fighting, fists and blood flying. Laura stepped off the mats, unimpressed. She didn't need Shadow to beat anyone up over her. And whatever Sweeney's issue was...she could handle it.  _She could handle it_. She wasn't just some object to protect.

The fight wasn't even worth her time.

It took Czernobog, Donny and Jack to pry the men apart. After the Fightmaster yelled out a "Dismissed!" the rest of them headed out of the room. Shadow caught Laura's disappointed eyes on her way out.

Twenty minutes later, Shadow and Sweeney stood, blood crusting on their faces, drying on their clothes, pain throbbing through their heads, in front of Marshal Wednesday.

Czernobog was there too, to tell him what happened.

Once everything was laid out, the Marshal sent his old friend away and walked around his desk to stand in front of both of them. Sweeney looked smug. Shadow looked a smidgen ashamed but also a little cheeky.

Wednesday sighed and leaned back against his big metal desk. "I told you all when you came here that we of the PPDC become like a family. Families fight. But boys...this is a little much." He glanced at their feet. "You're dripping blood on my floor for crying out loud."

"I'm sorry, sir," Shadow said speaking first.

"Yeah. I bet you are. I could have you both taken out of the program for this."

Sweeney shifted at that, the smugness on his face falling. "He punched me first," he said, throwing Shadow under the bus with the truth.

"I heard what Czernobog said. He said you've been at odds with each other since the first day."

Shadow scoffed a little. "I wouldn't say that, sir."

Wednesday put up a hand. "It doesn't matter. You got it out of your systems. Don't let it happen again. We have too few viable Rangers and too few Jaegers so I cannot afford to get rid of either of you. Do not take this as me being a fair and decent person. This is war, gentlemen, and I mean to win it."

With that, he let them off with the warning and they both left. A few yards away from the office, Shadow broke the ice.

"Look, man, I'm sorry."

Sweeney snorted. Well, he tried to but his face was kind of a mess. "Fuck off," he said, before taking off down a different hall.

 

 

_**DECEMBER 25, 2018** _

"Come on, babe, you have to forgive me," Shadow insisted, nearly groveling on his knees in front of Laura. They were all given a light day today, given the holiday. Not everyone at the Academy even celebrated the day and nearly everyone forgot its significance thanks to the war. Kaiju busting through the ocean floor kind of made one doubt check your priorities.

"Oh, do I?" Laura tilted her head toward the ceiling, squinting.

"You can't tell me you haven't wanted to punch him yourself."

She kept walking and he kept following. "Maybe. But we're not in a school yard, Shadow." She stopped and he nearly ran into her. But at least she was looking at him now. "We're here to learn how to fight kaiju. Do you understand how massive that responsibility is? Doesn't it scare you that we get six months of training and then we're tossed into a giant machine that could potentially be our coffin?"

He hesitated, processing before answering. "You're right. I should have controlled myself better."

"Damn right."

"But, Laura, the way he was-"

"It doesn't matter! It doesn't matter what he said or what sort of look he gave me. I can fight my own battles and that  _isn't_  a battle."

Shadow nodded. "Okay. I'm sorry."

"The real battle is out there." Laura flung her arm out, hoping she was pointing to the ocean and not inland. It didn't really matter because her point was made. "Do you get that?"

"Yes." He walked closer, testing how close she'd let him. Pretty close. Close enough to cup her face in his hands. "I love you. Forgive me?"

She thought about it and then stepped back, out of his grasp. "Not yet."

"It's been like ten days!"

"And maybe I need ten more!" She turned around and hurried down to her room before he could stop her again, closing the door and cutting herself off from everyone else.

"Rough day?" Sam asked from her bed, where she was laying with an icepack on her hand.

Laura flopped down onto her bed and screamed into her pillow. Eventually, she rolled over onto her side and zeroed in on Sam's hand. "What happened? Are you okay?"

"Didn't break anything," Sam shrugged. "I do not recommend dropping a three pound wrench onto your wrist. It does a number."

"I'll keep that in mind," Laura said, tucking her arm under her head. "Why are guys such pieces of shit?"

"Genetics?"

"Even the nice ones! They're all fucking ridiculous."

Sam moved the ice around and hissed as she flexed her fingers. "There's plenty of willing women on the other side."

Laura laughed bitterly. "I'm pretty sure I'd just fuck up any relationship if I tried hard enough."

"You want to try? I'm ready and willing." Sam grinned.

Laura smiled a little and met Sam's eyes across the space between their beds. "You're my only friend here. I can't fuck that up."

Sam sighed. "Maybe in another life."

 

 

_**DECEMBER 27, 2018** _

Sweeney found his way to the Jaeger bays. They maintained and upgraded Jaegers at the Shatterdomes, but there was only so much space and technicians there. All new Jaegers were still built here, on Kodiak Island, and tested here too. They'd be testing in March by anyone who made it through the full training period.

He was a tall guy and he was used to big sizes, but honestly nothing could compete with a Jaeger. It was like a supersized child's toy, except a lot more deadly and a hell of a lot more fun to play with. He couldn't wait to get into one.

There were three currently being made, all in different stages of completion. Sparks and voices flew in the huge space, the roof soaring three hundred feet up. One was nearly complete, though it was missing its outer shell around the abdomen. Another was mostly done, including the heart, though one of the arms was missing a hand. The third was, alternatively, just a pair of sturdy legs and the beginnings of the abdomen. It would be a while before it was ocean worthy.

He wondered which one would be his.

There were J-tech running around, shouting in various languages, ducking and weaving around him as he sauntered through. Most of them were wearing the same blue and gray clothes as him, though theirs was grease and oiled stained and they hadn't needed to layer on extra shirts to keep off a chill.

"Hey!" A voice called. Belonged to a short guy with long hair pulled back. His voice was thick with an East Indian accent. "You looking for your friend?"

Sweeney wasn't really looking for anyone in particular, but he recognized the guy. He was a fresh recruit, in training with the lot of em. He'd seen the guy in the Kwoon, watching the future Rangers combat training. "Yeah, sure," he said.

The guy nodded and pointed  _up_  at the catwalks and platforms high above. Sweeney saw the shape of someone a little ways up. With nothing else to do, he made his way up, climbing ladders and shaking away the vertigo of being that high. He wasn't even as tall as a Jaeger; barely reached the machine's belly button, if it had one, by the time he reached the proper level.

The other Ranger was sitting on the edge, arms resting on the thin bannister. She wasn't perturbed by the height. She looked kind of dreamy.

"Hey," he said, too late to turn back now that he'd clanked his heavy boots all the way up here.

"Hi," she said, sounding almost kind before she glanced up and saw that it was him. The relaxed expression on her face soured. "Oh. It's you."

"Yes. It's me." He sat himself next to her, pausing for a moment before tossing his legs off the side, letting them dangle there. A hundred and fifty feet off the damn ground. He was thankful for the bar at his chest level that he could balance himself with.

"Sorry about your face," she said, resting her chin on her hands, her attention taken by the Jaeger. Just yesterday she'd smashed his already wounded face with a hanbo. It was an accident.

Sweeney touched the side of his face and shrugged. "Asked for it."

Her mouth twitched up in a smile. "Maybe so."

He wrenched his eyes away from her and to the Jaeger in front of them, the one just missing its outer shell. "This one have a name yet?"

"Nope. My roommate's working on it. Says they don't name them until it's been tested. Some superstition thing."

"Think they'll give her a fancy paint job and roll out merch once it gets pilots?"

"Obviously." Laura kicked her feet back and forth like a kid. With the success of Jaegers, Rangers were considered celebrities of the Kaiju War. They did press, had news interviews, and their Jaegers got merchandise. Shoes, baseball caps, backpacks, jackets. "You itching to become a new age rockstar?"

"It wouldn't hurt," he confessed with a grin. "Recognition for what we're doin' here."

She sighed. "Tell me you're not doing this  _just_  for the glory. No wonder you're such a mess in the Kwoon." They both knew this to be a lie, but she said it anyway, her default insult.

Whatever  _nice_  moment they'd been having floundered. Sweeney frowned and narrowed his eyes. "I'm not in it just for the glory," he emphasized. "I've seen the news. We all saw Raythe get taken down, but everyone in this place knows a Ranger's lifespan is short. It's a wonder we've even got Wednesday, Nancy and Cznernobog. By most standards, they all should be dead."

Laura pressed her lips together and swallowed, leaning back and curling her hands around the bannister. "You say that, but I still don't think you're putting enough effort into this training." She sounded tired, but that didn't stop him from bristling.

"I could say the same for you. Fucking around with Shadow fucking Moon all the fucking time."

"At least I'm trying to enjoy my  _short Ranger lifespan_. What do you do? Fuck up Bushido, drink and smoke?" She scoffed and stood, taller than him for a rare moment. She wiped her hands on her pants. "I don't even know how you got recruited in the first fucking place."

She started walking away as he grappled for an answer to toss after her. "But I did get fucking in, didn't I?!" he finally spat out, but it was pretty weak and she just rolled her eyes and disappeared down a ladder.

"Fuck," he muttered, slamming his palm down against the bannister and sending vibrations through the whole platform.

 

 

_**JANUARY 1, 2019** _

"Does this mean you forgive me?" Shadow asked when Laura kissed him at midnight.

"For now," she said, before giving him a little shove of annoyance. "As long as you don't fucking do that again."

"Okay," he agreed and then pulled her toward him.

 

 

_**JANUARY 20, 2019** _

"Good news," Marshal Wednesdsay said, facing the ten Rangers. "You all made it to the testing weeks. Czernobog's given his full report for all of you and his recommendations for co-pilot testing. The Pons system we use for testing is different from the Jaeger. It's...let's just say, it's less. The Jaeger will be ten, a hundred times stronger. But we gotta start somewhere, right?"

There was a resounding response of "Yes, sirs" from the prospective Rangers.

"Good. And I don't want to hear anyone pissing and moaning about who they're lined up with. We're looking for the strongest bonds for the best Jaeger compatibility. You're getting your partners whether you like it or not." His eyes lingered on Shadow and Sweeney, calling them out without actually saying their names. Everyone knew though. Everyone had seen the fight in the Kwoon. Everyone knew it was over Laura.

Laura hated that fact, but she was here to get a Jaeger and as long as she did, that's all she cared about.

"All right. Get your schedules for the rest of the training and be nice to the scientists, all right? They're the ones that'll fry your brain if you piss them off." Wednesday walked off and the Rangers gathered around the table to get their new printed schedules.

"Who's first?" Dia asked, peering at her sheet, still blocked out but with significant hours blocked off for Drift testing. Not every day for each person, but a few times a week for the next nine days.

"Us," Donny said and he didn't need to say that Columbia shared his same schedule.

Laura saw that her first session was the next day and it matched with Shadow's. Either Czernobog was messing with them, or Shadow had pulled his teacher's pet card and made it happen. She had a feeling her other times would match with Sweeney's but she tried not to think about it.

 

 

_**JANUARY 21, 2019** _

"Okay so this is just a very limited mental stimulate and the simulation will be a fraction of the full neural handshake," one of the scientists said, sticking Laura's neck delicately with a needle. Someone else was poking Shadow's neck too.

The room was bright white and had no windows except into the observation room, where there were only a handful of scientists. The medical doctors were waiting on the edge of the room in case of an emergency.

Laura wished she didn't feel like she was about to throw up.

"In a full handshake, you'd basically relive each other's lives from childhood to the present every time you Drift. But here, there may be a few flashes of memory and a bit of connection, but it'll be very minor," the scientist prattled on. "We'll be observing in the other room on the computers."

Skullcaps with multiple electrodes were placed on either of their heads. They were thankfully seated. There was no need to move around for the tests.

"It may be a little uncomfortable. Please talk to us and let us know if anything feels wrong or bad or if you're in pain." The scientist was really nice and Laura wished she could thank them for their bedside manner but she was nervous.

"Just keep breathing and relax," the other scientist said before they both left the room.

"You nervous?" Shadow asked.

"Yes. Are you?" Laura breathed deep and tried to pry her hands off the arms of the chair. They'd already been in this room for an hour and a half prepping and talking with the doctors and scientists. She was getting sick of seeing white walls.

"A little excited maybe."

She wished a lot of things right now and excitement would have been nicer than this.

A voice came through the intercom system. "Okay, Shadow, Laura. We're going to slowly turn on the machine now. We'll be tracking your vitals and your brainwave activity. You don't have to do anything but breath and focus. Try to keep yourself in the current moment, like we talked about."

They made it sound so easy.

The machine hummed and Laura swore she felt the wires going into her cap warm up but it was probably just her nerves.

There was a weird pressure in her head and then, like finally bursting through a membrane, something  _broke_  or  _popped_  and she got flashes of something.  _A blink of Lady Liberty on Ellis Island. Of a Joan Jett poster from her childhood bedroom. Of the feeling of being punched fully in the face._

She scrambled to breath and blinked into the white room, anchoring herself in reality. Having the doctors there actually helped. She studied their faces as they talked quietly between each other. The memories, both hers and Shadow's, she realized, faded away. And she was still in this room.

"How are you doing?" the scientist asked.

"Fine. I think," Laura said, frowning a little. She didn't dare look at Shadow.

"I'm not dead! Is that a good sign?" Shadow said.

She smiled just a bit. Maybe this wouldn't be so bad.

They sat there, feeling a tug at their conscious but nothing more.

"The readings are a little weak. We're going to turn it up just a little bit okay?"

More memories like frames in a movie.  _A warm yellow sink in a NYC apartment. Burying a goldfish in the backyard. Dad shouting. A worn copy of Gilgamesh in French_.

The pressure in Laura's head built. It was like a bad headache. She could deal with it, but it wasn't all that pleasant. She wondered what Shadow thought of all this, if he felt the same. She looked over at him then and he looked at her.

She smiled a little. So did he.

"This is weird," she said softly.

"How are you feeling now?" the voice asked.

"My head's all pressurey. Is that normal?" Laura asked, because it felt worth mentioning.

"It is. The Pons system for testing is not as smooth a transition as the one in the Jaegers, I'm afraid."

They sat there for a while longer until the voice crackled through again. "That's all for today. I'm turning off the machine now."

The pressure in Laura's head was pretty much instantly gone. The doctors came over to remove the caps and check their vitals and make sure they didn't pass out when they stood up.

One of the scientists came in once they were all cleared. "The connection was a little weak, but we can try again for you two in a couple days. I'd like to test it more."

Shadow looked over the moon that someone was taking his request seriously. "Yeah. Whatever you need to do."

Laura nodded, though she said nothing until they were out in the hall. "What did you see?"

"Not much. It was like flipping through pictures."

"Me too." She pondered this for a moment. "They said it'll be way stronger in a Jaeger. Do you think you'd be ready for that?"

He laughed unexpectedly. "Yeah, I think I can handle it. C'mon, babe, it's not like either of us are mass murders or anything. And what do you have to hide?"

 _Myself_ , Laura thought. "Nothing," she said.

 

 

_**JANUARY 24, 2019** _

"This isn't going to work," the female scientist said.

Laura rubbed her nose and pinched the bridge, relieving the leftover pressure from the second go around in the testing room with Shadow. "It's not?" Fuck, she needed to sound less relieved.

Shadow frowned. "Are you sure?"

Luckily, the woman didn't take offense to someone who'd never gone to college questioning the very delicate science and technology hybrid that made up her life's work. "I'm sure. You could Drift, if it was an all or nothing situation, but the neural bridge isn't strong enough to be a viable Jaeger co-pilot candidate. Don't take it personally. Brains are delicate things."

They walked away and Laura crossed her arms and bit the inside of her cheek and itched for a cigarette. "Hey, Shadow," she said after a while. She even reached out and touched his arm. He stopped walking and she set herself in front of him. "I'm sorry."

"Me too." He put his hands on either side of her neck. "But I remember what you said. This is more than just about us. We both need to be out there beating down kaiju."

"You make it sound so easy," Laura teased lightly.

"I know, I know. It won't be. But I'm...I'm okay with this."

 _This_  being Laura matching up with Sweeney. They both knew that but neither of them pointed it out.

Laura pushed herself up on her toes and kissed him and then laced her fingers through his and they walked down to the mess hall.

 

 

_**JANUARY 27, 2019** _

Laura was way less nervous. For one, she knew what to expect. And for two, she wasn't trying to hide a damn thing from Sweeney.

Sweeney wasn't nervous either. Even though he had things to hide.

"This'll be like before," the scientist said from the other side of the glass. They were already in the seats, in their caps, the doctors at the ready.

"I hope your brain isn't as foul as your mouth," Laura commented just before the connection was started. The pressure built in both of their brains.

_A beer drenched library book. A car flipping in the road. A wreath of bright roses, thorns taking blood from the hands that held it._

Laura blinked back into the room. She remembered to breath now.

"What did you see when you tried this with Dia?" she asked, because she hated the silence and the hum.

"Nothin' I care to remember," Sweeney said, shifting a little in the seat. They were like dentist chairs. Cushiony but set at a weird angle. He was also a little too tall to be comfortable in it. "How's your man feel about this?"

"He's accepted it," Laura said, though she was still worried about what would happen if this worked and Shadow had to watch Laura share her entire history with Sweeney in a Jaeger that was  _theirs_.

Sweeney chuckled.

"It's looking good, you two. I'm going to turn it up a little bit now," the scientist said through the intercom.

Another flash of memories, scattered through, not long enough to drag emotion along with them.  _A broken toy horse. A heavy hammer swinging, breaking bones. The creak of a shed door_.

They sat there for a long time. It always felt shorter than it was. But eventually, the machines were turned off, the doctors gave them a once-over and then the scientist came in. This time, she looked pleased and was holding a large, clipboard sized tablet in her hands.

"I have good news. You two have a very strong neural bond that will, hypothetically, lead to a strong handshake. I'd like to see you in the simulator together for the rest of the term."

Laura's eyebrows rose. "Just like that? You don't need to...double check or something?"

"Not at all. Czernobog has a knack for knowing who'll fit. He doesn't even use any of the PPDC forms and techniques to figure it out." The scientist shook her head. "Remarkable. I think you have the strongest tests of everyone here."

"Even the husband and wife?" Sweeney asked, a little bit of shock in his voice.

"Donny and Columbia? Yes. Even them. Which I shouldn't have just told you, but yes." The woman flushed and stepped aside. "See you on Wednesday in the simulator."

Sweeney looked positively gleeful as they walked into the hallways. Laura scoffed and rolled her eyes. "Wipe that look off your face," she said,  _demanded_.

"I shan't." He grinned wide. "Shadow's gonna be pissed."

Laura pursed her lips. He was right, but she didn't need him to know she knew that. "He'll be fine. He understands that this is about saving the world."

"Mmmhmmm."

Unfortunately, they had to walk all the way to the elevator and make their way down to the lower levels together. By the time they got to the bottom floor, Sweeney was humming under his breath and Laura wanted to punch him. Just a little bit.

 

 

_**JANUARY 30, 2019** _

The simulation room was like a huge VF simulator. It looked a lot like a Conn-Pod, with the motion rig to get strapped into, and hydraulic floors to simulate the physical weight of moving a Jaeger. There was even the control panels and a HUD screen.

They had to get put into drivesuits specifically made to their sizes to fit like like gloves. They were white and thick, clunky things laid out over a wetsuit looking thing filled with electrical work. It was all a pretty intense experience.

Finally, they were strapped into the boot clamps and the backs of their suits were attached to the rig.

Marshal Wednesday's voice came crackling through their helmets. "All right you two. The simulator runs a neural handshake at pretty much full capacity. Let the memories wash over you, don't follow any of them. Got it?"

"Yes, sir," they replied.

"Good. Don't make me regret keeping you on, Sweeney," the man added as the room dimmed and the screen flickered on in front of them.

"What did he mean by that?" Laura asked, genuinely curious.

"Nothing you won't know in a few minutes," Sweeney grunted.

They went through their first round of systems checks. It was all new, but Laura was happy to learn that Sweeney wasn't a complete fuck up and he knew what he was doing.

"Systems check," Laura said for the  _officialness_  of it. The people on the other side of the glass, behind the motion rig, were playing at being the official LOCCENT you'd be connected to in missions.

"Ready pilots? Neural handshake initiated," a voice neither of them knew said into their headpieces.

There was that same pressure and then pop, only this time, it was full blown memories intermixing between them, full of emotion and more than just flashes.

_Being upset about sharing a room with a baby sister so much that she punched her mom and fell asleep crying in the bathroom_  
_A kind old face with fading red curls and a kind smile lacing tales of the fair folk for his ears only_  
_Dad was yelling and he smelled gross, like cigarettes and something else_  
_But no, Dad was a nice guy, if not a little sad, patting him on the head and handing out money like he was made of it_  
_Walking home in the rain after Mom forgot to pick her up from school_  
_Getting drunk in a fairy ring and dreaming of mounds of gold_  
_Panic through the school, the bar with the news turned to the monster from the sea_  
_Screaming at her sister and sitting on the bathroom floor with Dad's straight razor to her wrist because what was the fucking point_  
_The blast of cold stepping out onto Kodiak Island for the first time_  
_Almost getting an elbow to the face_  
_His eyes on her in the Kwoon_  
_Her eyes on Shadow most of the time_  
_The eerily ethereal way he saw her in that hotel, in that bar  
_ _Sitting at the heart of a Jaeger_ __**together**

They were physically jolted back, the motion rig moving with them as they gasped and shook their heads. Everything swam together, mixing up their thoughts, memories, feelings.

"Looks good. Calibration?" the voice in their helmets prodded.

Sweeney moved first, calibrating the left hemisphere of the Pons. A simple arm movement locked it in. Laura found herself following his movements without thinking, without a single lag or delay.

She calibrated the right hemisphere and voiced the confirmation.

"Good. Neural handshake steady and strong."

Laura breathed deeply, as if she'd just run for five miles. "Fuck," she muttered. She couldn't remember if the others could hear them. She didn't really care.

She hadn't known what to expect with a full handshake, but it wasn't anything like she thought. It wasn't like watching a movie, it was like living it and  _knowing_ it, and yet it floated on by and past her and she couldn't really grasp it. At most, she felt like she was in two places at once.

"Always wanted to be able to do that," Sweeney answered her thoughts.

She said nothing, tried not to think about the way he saw her, about the way he was attracted to her, because while it wasn't a surprise, she hadn't expected to feel it  _right there_  simmering on the surface.

"We'll start with just a Jaeger on the testing field, Rangers. Get a feel for how it moves. There'll be a display on your screen. If you can last, we'll add in a kaiju." That was the Marshal.

"Okay," Laura said, snapping to focus.

\----

They stayed in the simulator for two hours. They didn't take down the kaiju added near the end, but not for lack of trying. Wednesday had pulled the plug before they could get that far.

It felt like a weird sort of empty and loneliness when the neural bridge was severed between them, cutting off their connection. With help, they were stripped down and changed into their normal gear.

Laura felt like she was walking through quicksand until she shook out her limbs. Sweeney caught her before she headed down to find Shadow.

"Hey," he said, catching her upper arm gently in his hand.

She let him and slowed to a stop, tilting her head up. She waited.

"Are you ready for this?" he asked finally.

"We already did it."

He sighed and let go of her arm. "I uh…" He frowned and looked down, past her.

Laura took pity on him. Or so she told herself. If she believed in souls, her soul felt a little sore and achy after sharing itself with another person. She also wanted to get right back into the simulator, but knew that there were multiple teamups that needed to use it. "C'mon," she said, her voice a bit gentler than usual. "Let's go find something to eat."

They walked in commutable silence down to the mess, which was nearly empty at the off hour. They sat opposite each other and ate and shook off the ghostly, post-Drift feeling.

Laura really, really tried to shake out the image of herself through his eyes. Instead, multiple of them seemed to take up residence in front of her eyes every time she blinked. She'd obviously never seen herself through anyone else's eyes before, but it was even more disconcerting because it was Sweeney.

Maybe she should have tried harder to connect with Shadow.

Fuck, it was too late now.

"About the uh…" he started and trailed off.

"How about we don't dissect each other's lives, okay?" she said, her voice sharp. "I'll accept that your life is your own and mine is mine."

He nodded. "Okay." Pause. "Ever?"

She scoffed in the back of her throat.

"I only ask because we'll be in the sim for another four weeks until graduation. And then we'll be in a Jaeger…"

"Let's just...see how it goes. It's not like we're friends, is it?" She looked at him then and he met her eyes. She looked away first.

"You're right."

They ate in silence, until they had cleared their plates and were beginning to feel more like themselves. Sweeney stood up first. He dug into his pants pocket and pulled out a small box. "Here," he said, tossing it at her before taking his tray and walking toward the exit.

Laura looked down and found herself holding a pack of Lucky Strikes, which were her preferred cigarette brand. She blinked down at them, wondering when he noticed that's what she smoked, wondering when he'd had the time to track them down because they didn't sell them on this island. She'd checked when they were away from the compound.

Face screwed up in a frown, she shoved them into her pocket, put her tray where it belonged and then made it back to the corridor with the recruits rooms before Shadow found her.

"How'd it go?" he asked, once he'd properly greeted her with a big warm hug and a lengthy kiss.

"It was...a lot," she said, slipping her arms around him. Shadow wouldn't know. He didn't go into the simulator until the following day. "But it was kind of amazing," she admitted.

 

 

_**FEBRUARY 14, 2019** _

"Don't think I don't realize the irony of being here today," Laura said once her helmet was on and she was getting strapped into the motion rig.

Sweeney held up his hands in surrender. "I said nothing." He smirked anyway. "Just keep your Valentine's fantasies with your man to yourself."

"I'll try," she said dryly. A few minutes later, they were pulled into the Drift. Different memories stuck out each time, but the feeling each time was the same. Generally speaking, each time was like slipping right back into the same moment as before.

The Rangers had been spending almost all of their time in the sims, each time longer than the last. Sweeney and Laura had already taken down a handful of kaiju. On screen of course. Some in the ocean, some near the coast. Today, they were directly in a cityscape.

Contrary to what Laura had said months ago, they spent an awful lot of time just punching a kaiju in the face during their fights. She knew it and ate her words and left him feeling smug, which bled into her and fueled their fights.

They weren't classy fighters. But they worked together surprisingly well. Surprising to those who observed their simulations. Surprising to everyone who had worked with them in the Kwoon all those months. Surprising, mostly, to themselves.

The kaiju today was very dinosaur-like. It had a tiny mouth and tiny eyes, but a big head and thick legs and a massive tail. The Jaeger in the simulator had plasma basters in both hands for weapons. They shot and ducked just in time before the beast stumbled into them. As it screeched, they stepped on its tail. Got flung back into a building. Smashed a fist into its face. Stepped on the tail again and blasted it right at the base.

The kaiju screamed again and knocked them back with a sweep of its head. They shattered a business building. The kaiju charged and Sweeney wanted to uppercut it, so Laura followed through with the move, sending the beast onto its back in the street.

Sweeney's laughter filtered through the helmets. She could also feel it wordlessly through the neural link, forcing an amused smile on her face. They stood above the stunned beast-it was a small category one-and readied their second canon.

"Just think," Sweeney said, turning away from the HUD for a moment. "In just a few weeks we'll be doing this for real."

"Focus," she said, even as she struggled to keep a straight face. A few seconds later they blasted the kaiju's skull for a kill.

Sadly-god, when did these moments become a highlight in their lives-once you made a kill, you had to leave the sim to let the next Ranger group in, no matter how long it took.

Just a few hours today and Laura floated out into the hall after changing into her normal clothes. She did this always, waiting for Sweeney against her own will and then they'd work their way down to the mess and get food and not talk about the memories that stuck.

Today would be no different.

\----

Fuck it all if Shadow wasn't a sappy fuck and proposed to her on Valentine's day. He had no ring and they couldn't leave the compound so he did it once the mess was mostly empty. Went down on a knee and everything.

Laura said yes, kissing him over and over in hopes of convincing him and herself that she meant it. Because she did, didn't she? She had  _actually_  fallen for him, it just took a little longer than the words had left her lips in the town of Kodiak. But he was good to her and good for her and she didn't want to die alone. She would gather as many people around her who could stand her personality and she wouldn't be alone.

 

 

_**FEBRUARY 28, 2019** _

Another assembly, though the feeling was different now than it was before. These were no longer strangers surrounding them. This was Laura McCabe sitting next to Shadow Moon and leaning her shoulder against him. This was Sam leaning forward from her seat to whisper something witty to Laura before Wednesday got to the podium.

This was everyone prepared to put their lives on the line for the sake of the planet.

Marshal Wednesday grasped the edges of the podium and looked out at them. Only a few faces were missing, those that couldn't cut it. "You've made it here through hard work and dedication. There were some stumbles along the way, but I'm pleased to say we have ten new Rangers," pause for applause, "two fully functioning new Jaegers," another applause for the J-tech crew, "and a number of great minds added to the PPDC.

"Today will be some of your last days here on Kodiak Island. Some of you will stay to work on the Jaegers and with the next recruitment group that gets here tomorrow. Most of you will be going to Shatterdomes. I don't make the rules, but I have your deployments here." Wednesday lifted a tablet. "Of the Rangers, two sets of pilots will be getting the newest Jaegers. The rest of you...well, you'll just have to wait, simple as that." He cleared his throat. "Getting the Jaegers sitting in our very own facility will be...Shadow Moon and Low-Key Lyesmith." Cheers and Laura squeezed his hand. "And Laura McCabe and Sweeney MacColeman."

Sweeney was not sitting on Laura's other side, but she wished he was so she could...well she didn't know. Squeeze  _his_  hand, maybe? Instead, she sat forward and offered him a smile around the three people between them. He smiled back, small and genuine.

"Samantha Black Crow will be joining both teams on J-tech in the Anchorage Shatterdome."

A soft, "Fucking hell," could be heard coming from Sweeney. Laura hid her laugh with a cough and listened as Wednesday sent the other Rangers to other Shatterdomes across the Pacific Rim. He then sent some K-science and J-tech other places too.

And that was that. The Rangers got flight pins and instructions for leaving the Academy the next day.

It wasn't as big a deal as any of them thought it would be. But it made sense. For the Rangers at least, this was the start of the rest of their short lives.


End file.
